NEW YEARS! YEAAAAH-Uuuuuuggggghhhh…
New Years! We made it guys, another year done!
*Ugh*
Staring down the barrel of another complicated year, there’s even more pressure to set out serious New Years Resolutions… eat better, workout, get the family on track, get out of debt, Make. A. Plan.
But we’re on a giant hook this year, we know better than to solidify plans, we feel nervous looking into the future… we’re like the small kid afraid to go up the dark staircase for the fear our older sibling is going to jump out and scare us. The future doesn’t feel, safe…
*BOO!* IT ALL MIGHT FALL APART.
So what if this year’s New Years resolutions are different? What if they are a call to release the expectations and objectives of the future and to embrace the unravelled moment of The Now? To have the courage to live the truth of Leonard Cohen’s heart-wrenching, ‘cold and very broken hallelujah.’
In this holy moment we have access to the beautiful Jesus truth, that we never really had control of our lives and circumstances anyway. Not really…
That despite the best organization, safe-guarding, and financial planning, life is going to always hit you up where it hurts the most…
For me, ‘the worst’ is the latent and persistent threat of destabilized comfort and security of our home and my life as an entrepreneur. Are we going to have to sell the house? Do I need to rush out and abandon the path I'm on for one that’s ‘safer’ and ‘more secure?’ How the hell do we pay all the bills?!?
It’s uncomfortable trying to hang your life on an ever-shifting state of unknowns.
But this isn’t an unfair shakedown, or a bad hand; it should be expected.
Humans are the only creatures on God’s green planet that only truly learn when things are hard and ugly. We become the very best version of ourselves when we can dig the diamonds out of the coal mine and then walk away, richer and light in step knowing we have the best parts that the darkness had to offer. Knowing all the while, that we don’t have to live in the darkness (or carry around heavy-ass bags of coal…).
So, 2022? I have a pocket full of diamond shaped grace from the lessons of the last two years and a wide open broken heart. And it’s a beautiful thing.
Holding the future lightly with the praise of Hallelujah Anyway ringing in the new year.
Xo
C.